So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
