Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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