Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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