We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
