it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
