8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i now understand why vodka
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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