This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Randomize
