Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
