I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Randomize