She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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