I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
