I hate all girls vehemently.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize