It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
sex in a hospital.. check
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
