Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
