Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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