Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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