you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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