Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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