i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
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