We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
