Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
OPIZZABONMYDICK
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
