I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
