Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize