Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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