So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize