There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
