i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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