Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
