Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
