are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Randomize
