we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
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Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
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I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
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