Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
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