told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize