So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
well you can't waste a boner
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
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