i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Someone came in the potted fern
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
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