i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
