My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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