Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
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