If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
