Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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