he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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