he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
