OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize
