i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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