this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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