no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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