I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Small penises have feelings too.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
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