Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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