Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
whose parrot is this?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
