is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I wear drunk well.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
