I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
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